how to make decisions through self-love and intuition [not fear]

what if self-love became the filter you ran your decisions through?

in this episode, we’re talking about how to make decisions through self-love and intuition- not fear, pressure, or outside expectations. using the lens of the #selflove100, this conversation explores what shifts when you pause, listen inward, and start choosing from alignment instead of urgency.

this episode isn’t about perfect choices- it’s about learning to trust yourself more deeply as you move through everyday decisions.

connect with julia on instagram @beautybyjulia + tik tok @juliasalvia

unlock more archive content on instagram @theselflovearchive + tik tok @theselflovearchives

sign up for the self-love archives newsletter: www.theselflovearchives.com

Transcript

0:00

What if this time right now wasn't about creating new habits? It wasn't about upping your self care, it wasn't about becoming a brand new you. What if this season right now was just about elevating and choosing differently? As we said in last week's episode, we are not on this new year, new me kind of shit. We are elevating exactly who we are and choosing differently to align with our vision, value, and vibes. Welcome back to the Self-Love Archives podcast. I am your host, Julia Salvia, also known as your self-love festie, and I am coming to you from Costa Rica. I am looking at the most beautiful view ever right now. I will give you a little snippet of it because it is stunning, stunning. It's the beginning of the year. And as we said in last week's episode, we know like the beginning of the year, everyone thinks that you are supposed to completely reinvent yourself, become a brand new person, set all of these insane, insane goals. And that's actually not what I'm asking you to do for 2026, because how many times have you done that year after year after year and have gotten. Nowhere have reached maybe one of your 30 goals that you have set for yourself. There's something that's not connecting. There's something that's not clicking, and I think we're going to an extreme. We think that because we haven't reached all of our goals and have done all of the things that we need to completely change who we are, and that's just not it. We just need to make better choices. For the person that we are today and the person that we want to become. So last week we talked all about vision, value, and vibes, and that is going to live through a lot of our episodes as we move into 2026, but most especially in the beginning of 2026, because I really, really, really want you to get clear with what your vision is, how you can align your values to it, and what makes you feel vibe. What makes you feel like it all comes together to match your vision? We ended 2025 with the self-love 100, 100 days of loving yourself more, and I walked you through the perspective of the self-love 100 week after week to really get your life together before the end of the year. And. Really with the main goal in mind of loving yourself more. And the biggest part of the self-love 100 is the choices that you make for yourself. It's not about changing who you are, it's not about uprooting your life. If that aligns with you, by all means, I suggest you do it, because sometimes a little change can really make a world of a difference, and that's why I'm talking about the choices that you make. And that's how we're gonna be going into 2026 is really getting clear about the choices that you make, what you say yes to, what you say no to, through the lens of the self-love 100. So we're not looking at the self-love 100 as a checklist. We're not saying, okay, we did this today, we did that today, we did this, that, the other thing, although you can look at it as a checklist, we're actually going to be looking at the self-love 100 as a filter, as a way to go about our days and how we make decisions throughout our days. How do we wake up in the morning? What are we doing to fill our cup? What are we choosing to fuel our body with? What are the choices you are making that are rooted in value, that feel good vibes that are leading you to your vision? Every single time you come up to making a decision, whether that is a decision for something that you want to do with other people, something that you wanna do for yourself, something that has you on the fence of yes or no, I want you to ask yourself these three questions through the lens of the self-love 100. Does this support my vision? Does this align with my values? Does this. Give me the feeling, the vibe that I want to have this first quarter of the year. Now, if your answer is yes to all three of those, move forward, give that a yes. And please remember too that sometimes yes, can feel challenging. It can feel uncomfortable. Even when we know something is good for us, even when we know something's going to align with our vision, that doesn't make the yes any less hard. So with this perspective, I want you to go into the first quarter of 2026, really leaning into the self-love 100 as your filter to look at your life. If you're asking here and now, well, where do I start? You start today. You start right now as you listen to this podcast episode. You start today because this isn't about uprooting your life, changing everything, rebranding yourself. This is about the small choices that you make every single day for yourself. It's whether or not you decide to go out for a walk. It's whether or not you decide to communicate with a new friend that you made. It is whether or not you decide to meditate in the morning or stay in bed. These small choices that you make every single day for 100 days are going to lead you to loving yourself more, to elevating into the person that you wanna become. It will get you closer. These small choices will get you closer to the person that you see in this vision. Yours Because if we really sit here and think about it, it's not these giant choices necessarily that we make, that create us into who we are or who we wanna become. It's all of the small things that we decided to do consistently each and every day that bring us to who we wanna be. So you started, you created your vision. You have it right, so smack in front of you as a vision board, as a multimedia digital vision board, or it's just a vision that you have written down in this beautiful letter to yourself at the end of the year, whatever your vision is. The next question is, well, how do you. Make the decisions that are right for you. How do you make choices that are right for you that align with your vision? These choices need to be rooted in value. You need to know that if you make this choice today, that it will eventually lead you to your vision. But sometimes the lines can be blurred. Sometimes we don't know if a choice or a decision is the right one for us. And I have a little trick or something that I've worked very hard to figure out with myself because sometimes we can be on the fence about choices and decisions that we need to make for ourselves. We have fear and we have intuition. And these are two feelings that I want you to understand for yourself in your body. And what I've come to realize is that fear is loud. It's urgent. It's very reactive. Fear can come to you in a multitude of different ways, but I want you to discern good fear versus bad fear. Bad fear is when you're being chased by a bear and you need to ski daddle. You need to get out of there. Fear is when you are walking down a dark alleyway when you knew you should have taken the lighter path with all of the lights and more people. These are different feelings of fear. That we know and understand fear to be. But then there are also those feelings of fear that we know in our gut. Our intuition, which we'll talk about in a second, is telling us that this is good for us, but we are fearful that it's not going to lead to our bigger vision. For example, we may know that it's really good for us to get out there, to get out of our comfort zone and go meet new people. Go join one of our self-love walks, right, with tons of people that you don't know, and you may feel that urgency, that reactiveness that fear inside of you, because that's not something that you normally do. But your intuition is like, no go. This is gonna be so good for you. Yes, it's gonna be uncomfortable. Yes, it's going to be hard, but it's going to be so good for you. These are the two different types of fear I want you to discern. One is bad fear. One is good fear. Your body was made to protect you. Your body was made to keep you comfortable. Your body is created to keep you content. Because your body wants you to feel safe, so anything that is different or outside of your norm, of course you're going to be scared. Of course, it's going to be uncomfortable and you're going to have some fear because it's out of your norm, because it's not what you normally choose for yourself. I am asking you to choose the right decisions for yourself. The other feeling is intuition. Your intuition is calm, it's steady, and it's rooted in self-trust. And sometimes it can be really hard to listen to our intuition if we haven't practiced listening to it, listening to it, and trusting it, and trusting ourselves. And the best way to start trusting yourself more. Therein, listening to your intuition more is to do very small things that you said you would. I'm gonna go get the mail today. Get the mail today. I'm gonna brush my teeth in the morning, and I'm gonna brush my teeth at night. Brush your teeth in the morning and brush your teeth at night. I'm gonna go to the gym today, even if it's for 10 minutes. You start listening to your intuition. When you start to trust yourself and you start to trust yourself when you start to do the things you said you are going to do. So when you are making choices through the lens of the self-love 100, I want you to discern between fear and intuition. Good fear and bad fear and intuition. I want you to choose and make decisions that are going to align with your vision for the next 100 days. In the beginning of April, we're gonna come back and I'm gonna see how everything went for you, how the first quarter of 2026 treated you and how you made decisions differently. I promise you that even if you just make one decision different every single day, you do one thing consistently every single day, that may be out of your norm. It will change your entire life if you haven't yet. The download for the Self-Love 100 is completely free. All you have to do is click the link in the show notes below, sign up for email, and it will get sent directly to your email so you can download it. You'll get access to three different copies of it, so you could choose which one aligns best for you. Use the self-love 100 as a way to get you closer to your vision, make decisions and choices that lead you to the bigger picture. And in 100 days, I will see you back here and we'll see where you have gotten in the self-love 100, 100 days of loving yourself more. I hope you were having an amazing 2026 so far, and I will see you back here next week, Sunday, 12 o'clock Eastern time. Bye.